this time of night

Why is it that, during a week that is stressfully busy, and when I haven’t been getting enough sleep… I spend an hour and a half adding pictures and music to my blog?

One nice thing about not getting enough sleep is the knowing, as my head hits the pillow, that I’m going to have interesting dreams.

Last night was an awful one. The entire eastern KY homeschooling group was meeting daily at my home for a group school. I was sitting at a round table with them just waiting for the school day to end. I was so bored and frustrated at not being able to get anything done. I remember thinking that I  couldn’t wait for August when I could start my children in “real” school and get away from all this nonsense.

So it was a dream and all exaggerated and out of proportion. But I think it honestly portrayed some of my deepest feelings about homeschooling. Escape!

No matter how much I love the idea and believe that it’s my duty to make sure my children are educated, I just don’t want the responsibility. I’ve been happy to see each of my boys start their first day of school, and I look forward to Malin’s in the fall. (No tears here! -At least, not until my baby starts in 2 years…) I love the added freedom for myself during school hours, and I love seeing/hearing about the fuller life that they’re experiencing. And I’ve loved the more involved time I’ve had with my daughters these last two years. I look foward to the “only child” experience next year when Avery is the only one at home during the day.

A good teacher has to teach. And demand. Have expectations. Hold students up to high standards. And they should probably kind of like what they’re teaching. Live by something more forceful than “We’ll wait and see what happens…”  There are some things I should have realized before I bought two years of homeschool curriculum.

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About ruthie.voth

Wife of one, mother of four, friend of many. Lover of details, color, good conversations, finding balance, and being honest. Passionate lover of a well-crafted sentence - even more so if it's witty. Weird blend of cynical optimist. I'm the worst kind of woman. I'm high maintenance, but I think I'm low maintenance. Somehow, people still love me. Must be grace.
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3 Responses to this time of night

  1. Becky says:

    I have thought about homeschooling too, but i’m not disciplined enough for it and definitely don’t have enough patience.
    I have cried whenever the school bus pulled away when Josh was in first and second grade, after that I was just glad to get a break from the kids. lol
    I can understand why parents do it, but I think it’s good for them to play and have diversity in the class rooms. I know some kids are really sheltered that are homeschooled and don’t have a clue of what real life is like. I’m very thankful that Gabbie and Josh are what I call ‘color blind’. They have good friends that are from all different races and are shocked if someone mentions the color of their friends skin. I was asking Josh what his friend’s name was, and he asked which one, and I said the “black boy with the green shirt on” and Josh said, ” Anthony is black??”

    Back to the school thing though, I have often thought how much I miss Connor and how I was looking forward to when Gabbie and Josh had school so I could have some individual time with him. I got robbed of that.

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  2. Kris says:

    So did you try to homeschool one of your kids? I always thought that homeschooling might be a good option for me until I had kids. Now I know that I would not enjoy doing it and I really want my kids to get out there and have other experiences outside of our home. I also happen to have personality conflict with my oldest so we both need some time apart. I can’t wait for her to start kindergarten in 2009.

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  3. Great honest post! I have very mixed feelings on this subject. I think some homeschools do it very well but not all of them! There are definitely pros and cons. Parents shouldn’t do it out of guilt! They should feel called to it and know it is right for them.

    I am convinced that Proverbs 31 woman is a conglomerate of all of us! I quit trying to be all that along time ago!

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